Alphabet

If I ever have children, this is how I’m teaching them the alphabet.

Gashlycrumb Tinies by Edward Gorey

A is for Amy who fell down the stairs

A is for Amy who fell down the stairs

b

B is for Basil assaulted by bears

CisforClara

C is for Clara who wasted away.

DisforDesmond

D is for Desmond thrown out of a sleigh.

EisforErnest

E is for Ernest who choked on a peach.

FisforFanny

F is for Fanny sucked dry by a leech.

GisforGeorge

G is for George smothered under a rug.

HisforHector

H is for Hector done in by a thug.

IisforIda

I is for Ida who drowned in a lake.

JisforJames

J is for James who took lye by mistake.

KisforKate

K is for Kate who was struck with an axe.

LisforLeo

L is for Leo who swallowed some tacks.

MisforMaud

M is for Maud who was swept out to sea.

NisforNeville

N is for Neville who died of ennui.

OisforOlive

O is for Olive run through with an awl.

PisforPrue

P is for Prue trampled flat in a brawl.

QisforQuentin

Q is for Quentin who sank on a mire.

RisforRhoda

R is for Rhoda consumed by a fire.

SisforSusan

S is for Susan who perished of fits.

TisforTitus

T is for Titus who flew into bits.

UisforUna

U is for Una who slipped down a drain.

VisforVictor

V is for Victor squashed under a train.

WisforWinnie

W is for Winnie embedded in ice.

XisforXerxes

X is for Xerxes devoured by mice.

YisforYorick

Y is for Yorick whose head was knocked in.

ZisforZillah

Z is for Zillah who drank too much gin.

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