Feeling a little rough today. (No! You say. But you never feel rough! You’re always so fit, so high on life! ) Well, these bad days happen to us all, doncha know. I’ve been dicking around with my meds lately which might explain the sudden splurges of creativity embroidered by moments of heart-breaking sadness. Can’t get a certain something off my mind. I wonder if I should write about it, or maybe just leave it inside my head like an old wound, and stop picking at it.
I saw the Miley Cyrus video this morning (that’s not the ‘certain something’ that’s been haunting me but, y’know, not far off) – Jesus Christ, the only thing that stops it from being porn is the lack of a huge pulsating cock thrust through a glory hole in that wall she’s trying to knock down. Such a confused sexual message, there’s no artistry in it at all. It veers from being all Sinead O’Connerish (I am emotional and tearful and beautiful) to NAKED NAKED I AM FUCKING NAKED AND I’M GONNA LICK THIS HAMMER GODDAMIT I’M GONNA LICK IT LIKE A LOON AND SWING ON THIS NOT-VERY-METAPHORISH WRECKING BALL JUST LIKE THE ONE IN THE TITLE AND I AM NAKED.
Alright Miley, Jesus. (What’s that Garbage song go like? “Yeah yeah we’re looking at ya…”)
Seriously though, I stopped watching ‘straight’ porn a while ago for exactly the same reasons. Just too…in ya face. And there seemed to be no choice – every clip was the same, the same grunting anonymous muscly bastard and the same Barbie Doll gal with big tits and 20 inch heels. I have nothing against these types of videos (aside from the fact that they’re boring as hell) but what I do take umbrage with is that you actually have to look for videos that resemble actual, normal sex between a regular man and woman. Most modern porn doesn’t even feature any KISSING for fuck’s sake. Kissing! One of the sexiest and most erotic things two people can do with one another, and it’s casually dropped out of the whole porn business as though it doesn’t matter. Don’t straight men get off on kissing, then? Isn’t it on the spectrum anymore? Am I that far removed from what heterosexual men enjoy?
I don’t want to be one of those ‘think of the children!’ types but when the most insidious aspects of modern pornography are informing the music industry and how it reaches out to kids, I think we’ve got a problem. I don’t want to live in a society where kids (boys as well as girls) are pressured into behaving a certain way, their sexualities being shaped to fit the videos they’re fed, so that it all eats itself like a snake gobbling up its tail, a big plastic consumerist circle jerk.
For me – Miley’s video isn’t just jarring, it’s really rather weird. What the hell is she trying to say with all this applesauce? It’s so self conscious. I think that’s my main problem with it actually – it’s nudity for the sake of nudity, gratuitous for absolutely no reason whatsoever. Y’know, at least Madonna made us think for a minute. Whatever happened to subtlety?
Maybe I’m just getting old. Aw, man.